Archive for January, 2011


As you may well know, I am an avid stalkbooker. If you do not know what that means, see the series of letters I wrote titled “Dear Facefriend.” Anyway, with Facebook comes facebook pictures, and with facebook pictures comes the overindulgent use of the Jersey-shore pucker. Now, I am not from anywhere or have even BEEN anywhere near Jersey shore, but I have decided this: it should stay in Jersey shore. I am in Utah, and most, if not all, of my friends are also from Utah and have no business doing the pucker–ESPECIALLY not in every photo contained in your Beloved Facebook albums. Do they hate their lips? Hungry for some face-sucking? Aliens bent on sucking out our brains leech-style?


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