Archive for January, 2009

Dear Facefriend 9

Dear Facebook Friend,

I felt your pain today, with the snow.  I too had to do a bit of digging.  I’m glad we could share that experience.

But, despite all of our bonding experiences and how much we know about each-other, I am led to wonder why I’m not on your top friends list?  This is very saddening to me…

One more thing, I tried to text you today — you know, with the number you put on your Facebook mobile?  I love that Facebook feature!  But anyway, I tried a few times, but you never texted back.  I guess you’re just busy.

🙂

Your BFF,

Amanda

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Dear Facefriend 8

Dear Facebook Friend,

I saw that you added “Marley and Me” to your list of favorite movies.  I saw it too!  It was so good!  You probably had redvines while you watched it, too, huh?  It’s on your “All About Me” as your favorite food.  But don’t you think you should pick something a little more nutritious?  You know that you have a family history of weight issues.

And by the way, you need to stop accepting Facebook gifts from… Well, you know who I’m talking about.

It would give them the wrong idea.

Love from your BFF,

Amanda

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Dear Facefriend 7 (this is getting a little out-of-control…)

Dear Facebook Friend of a friend,

I have noticed that you have recently begun dating one of my good Facebook friends.

I do not approve of this.

This is really for both of your well-being, but I would highly recommend ceasing this relationship.  Your Facebook compatability is really quite non-existent.  A mutual love for Harry Potter books is not something you can build a relationship on.

Sincerely,

Amanda

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Dear Facefriend (6)

Dear Facebook Friend,

I saw that you put up your daily class schedule — did you know that we have our lunch hour at the same time on Tuesdays?  It’s like we’re having lunch together!

But I suppose you eat your lunch with your “open relationship.”  Who, after a bit more reasearch, I have come to the conclusion that they are definitely not right for you.  Have you even checked out the music on their MySpace profile??

Love from your concerned BFF,

Amanda

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Dear Facefriend (5)

Dear Facebook Friend,

I would like you to know that I took your “how much do you know about me?” quiz and scored a whopping 90%!  I only missed the question about the dog you had in elementary school — You’ve never mentioned it to any of your friends, and don’t have any pictures up.  It must have been too traumatic to post on Facebook.

I thought that video you posted of you and your roommates was HILARIOUS!  It was great to hear your laugh.  You can’t get that from pictures.

.

.

.

🙂

Love from your BFF,

Amanda

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Dear Facefriend (4)

Dear Facebook Friend,

I read your poems.  They were quite nice.

About your new “open relationship” partner… I don’t think they’re right for you.  For one,  your “What color is your aura” quiz states that you have a blue aura, which, according to the writers of the quiz, the blue personality type is not compatable with the orange aura color, which, as fate would have it, is the same color that your “open relationship” has.

I also feel compelled to inform you that, within the past two weeks, they have gone from number three best catch amongst their friends to far below ten!

I’d feel bad if you got hurt again.  I felt it my duty as your friend to inform you of this sad fact.

And just as a sidenote, I tagged you in a few of your friends’ photos that you weren’t tagged in yet.

🙂

Love from your BFF,

Amanda

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Dear Facefriend (3)

Dear Facebook friend,

I am so happy that you put of pictures of your date last week!  It really looked like you had a lot of fun.

I think the person you went with really likes you, too.  They have gone from “single” to “in an open relationship,” which I assume is with  you due to them currently owning all of your pictures on “owned.”

You two seem relatively compatable — Both of you seem to have a certain affinity for Harry Potter novels.

I’ll bet you didn’t know that.  I added them as my Facebook friend, too.  I read all about them.

But I’m led to wonder — Why did you tell them on their wall that your favorite color was green when your “All About Me” said that your favorite color was orange??  I saw that their favorite color was also green, though.

And just a random thought — Did you ever get your drain unclogged?  I noticed your status the other day was in relation to your disgust with the situation.

Your BFF,

Amanda

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