Archive for October, 2007

Intentions?: Missed signals

Alright, so I admit it.  I have failed to post new blogs about the “experiment.”  and in the time between the first blog and this one, many things have come in to light, and it has ceased to be an experiment in intentions, but rather an experiment in the extent of my own idiosyncrasis and obliviousness to what the heck is going on.

In essence Jordan is no longer a key factor in this “experiment” but rather my sounding board for ideas on what IS really going on.  The only problem is, both of us are completely clueless in the field of “body language.”  And thus, this post shall be dedicated to the various items in the body language bag of tricks that will henceforth and forever boggle me and thus doom me to being single forever.

Most of these items occur while watching movies — which mostly have involved zombies and memory loss, thus to avoid those gosh darned face-sucking scenes (although, there was plenty of blood-sucking going on in the zombie movie.  But that’s just awesome).  And so we begin.

Item 1: seating arrangements.

Newbert has recently taken to sitting “dangerously close” during these frequent movies.  As in, shoulder to shoulder.  Being very cold everwhere in Cedar City, even inside buildings, I do not object, but rather sit in beffudlement as to this sudden breach of the one-foot barrier that most testosterone-bearing beings have hitherto seemed to keep from me.  It happened for all three movies we watched this past weekend (Yes, one every day.  Noone else wanted to do anything.  Don’t judge me!).  I recall a scene when I came to watch Arrested Development with Jordan and Newbert.  I arrived late, and thus there was little room on the couch and I had to sit on a separate sofa from Jordan and Newbert, between which was a very pleasant and friendly two-feet of space between.  When I arrived, Newbert moved farther from Jordan and closer to the edge of the sofa closest to the chair in which I was sitting.  But, no invitation to sit on the same couch.  During date 3 (Sidewalk chalking and hot chocolate at The Grind), there WAS, however, and invitation to sit on the same couch as we sipped our hot chocolate (a loveseat couch, nonetheless), with a claim that it was, in fact, a better couch than the regular three-cushion sofa I had at first taken to to enjoy my hot chocolate.  And then, suddenly, the most recent destruction of the couch barrier.

Anyway, it just causes me to wonder — how often does Newbert find occasion to do that?  Because he seems rather nonchalant about it all, whilst I sit rather awkwardly and stiffly.  I also have to wonder if any of this is registering in his brain.

Item 2: The dead fish arm

This, I hear, is a rather common hand-holding tactic, used by thousands of  assertive-less adolescents everywhere.  It consists, basically, of one of the couch-sitting members leaving their hand awkwardly on the couch at their side, closest to the other couch-sitter, in hopes that possibly the other couch member will grasp it and a “moment” will ensue.  I believe I have encountered this type of placement at other types of social events, but have never reciprocated well, because I, as you well know, am completely oblivious.  The question must be asked — is that actually an innocent arm-placement left there for no other reason than comfort, or is the placement a strategic way to create another level of couch-sitting-movie-watching?  I’m assuming I’ll never know.

Item 3: HIS head plus MY shoulder

This one I actually found rather… Hm… Odd.  I feel it as a bit of a role-reversal, if I’m correct.  As I see it in the movies, the FEMALE is supposed to innocently put HER head on the male’s shoulder, indicating “OMG I am SOO comfortable.  Lurvs.” But in this case, he apparently decided to take the initiative.  And I found the whole thing so hilariously ironic that I literally laughed out loud.  I have no idea how he took that, but it seemed to have to lasting effects, because he did it again, and just kind of stayed there while I flipped through the channels after the movie and came to rest on something on the food channel.  He stayed there for rather a long time.  It was all just… odd.  And so, my beffuddlement continues.

And so, there are the three main items that I wished to cover.  There are plenty more, but I just recieved an invitation for a walk from Newbert himself, as both of us have been cooped up in our rooms all day.

Maybe more later, we’ll see… 😉


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Intentions?: The beginning

You know, intentions are often lost in translation.  Especially to us estrogen-bearing beings in regards to those of the testosterone-bearing variety.

For example, and I only give one example for now for it is currently almost one in the morning because I was… well, we’ll get to that.  This guy — Let us call him… Newbert — recently asked my roommate out on a date because she was complaing about not having gone on any dates for a pitifully extended amount of time.  And then he kind of … Latched on.  Texting all the time, coming over to hang out a lot.  Really nice guy.  Lots of fun.  Then recently me and Jordan were discussing my complete lack of tallies on our date tally chart we have going  (Jordan — 3; Me — 0) while he just happened to be around, and he suddenly just says “I’ll add a tally,” and basically just asks ME out.  Now, this throws ALL of us for a loop (he is completely oblivious to our confusion, for he is a bearer of the blinding light of testosterone), for none of us were expecting it.  But we hide it well.  We all do a very good job at covering up how awkward the situation has become.

So, Jordan and I have a discussion — shall I take him up? We decide, yes.  It may be a fun experiment to see if Newbert is REALLY thinking he can date roommies.

Day one: Saturday, Oct. 06, 2007, 1:00 PM

Newbert texts Jordan, asking her if Amanda (that would be me) is around.  She laughs and tells her, then tells him that she will give her his phone number.  Amanda texts him and tells him that Jordan told her to text him.  He promptly asks her if she wants to go get breadsticks at Little Caesar’s.  Jordan and Amanda decide that it would be a wonderful installment in our little experiment.  So, Amanda replies sure and they later leave.  They walk to Little Caesar’s and order the breadsticks.  Conversation at a nearby table ensues, and Amanda decides to lean forward on the table, indicating interest in the conversation.  Newbert responds in time and leans forward as well, and continues to lean forward onto table even as Amanda leans back in her chair.  Conversation continues until breadsticks are served and into the breadsticks.  Amanda spills the beans about her Pokemon fetish in her younger years — He gets a few good laughs out of it.  In fact, he gets a few good laughs out of a lot of things.  A few of Amanda’s friends arrive and interrupt the conversation, and Newbert looks very awkward.  Amanda quickly ends the conversation with her friends and continues former conversation.  Breadsticks are completed and they leave the pizza place and walk over the grocery store, for Newbert is in need of some frozen pizzas.  Somehow, they end up in the Hot cocoa isle and they discuss their tastes in hot cocoa.  Newbert buys mint hot cocoa and they exit the store.

They begin walking back towards campus, where Newbert lets Amanda carry the bright orange flag accross the street.  As they continue on their way, there is a moment of physical contact where Newbert decides to “nudge” Amanda off the curb and into the bicycle lane.  A “playful” dirty look is given by Amanda, Newbert is slightly apologetic and offers a hand over the gutter that a small child could drown in. She refuses and jumps accross by herself as a large “Le Bus” drives by aboutf three feet away from Amanda just was, and the accusations fly that Newbert pushed her in front of the bus.  Jordan would later threaten his life over this.  Much laughter ensues and they arrive back at Amanda’s place, talk to Jordan where she threatens his life and he leaves to go the Priesthood session of General Conference.

Later, Newbert begins to text Amanda while he is still in the meeting.  He asks “so what are you up to?”  She tells him she is on a geeky website.  He sends her to his own website and she promptly calls it geeky.  A few emoticons ensue, and he hints at something that he will tell her later.  Date two is already in the works for the same day.

He later texts her, telling her when he will be over agian, “I’m gonna change and head over if thats ok”  She replies a hesitant, “okay” and he arrives ten minutes later.  Jordan leaves to a concert and the two are left alone* in the apartment.  Much hot-chocolating and conversation ensues and continues for the rest of the evening until about 11:00, at which time they commence in watching videos of Bill Nye and Chad Vader on Youtube until 12:30, at which time, both decided that it was late and he should go back to his place before the crazy people come out and the chance of him getting mugged on his way back increases by 30%. 

Heading towards the door ensues, but Newbert leans against the wall and continues in conversation.  This indicates a reluctance to leave.  Five minutes pass in conversation until he eventually leaves.  Date two over.  Intentions — as yet unclear.  We know there are many possible intentions he may posess, but the fact that he is dating both Amanda and Jordan is rather… Disconcerting?

Next episode — Sunday texting?  Maybe. We’ll see…

This blog and the blogs hereafter about our little “experiment” is intended to be read along with Jordan’s companion blog at

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