It is a known fact that Utah is it’s own little “special” world. I have lived that this “special” world for the larger part of my life. It’s rather lovely here, except, of course, it contains no semblance whatsoever to the so-called “real” world. I have no real comparisons to make, because I have no idea what the real world is actually like, apart from what I see on reality TV shows. So, from a Utahn’s perspective of what the real world is like from my 14-inch TV screen, here is what I surmise would be my experience anywhere but Utah/Idaho. (also, see http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Utah for a deep and “insightful” view of Utah and it’s “culture”)
If I were to move out and live in the real world, I would live in an apartment with a nice balcony where I would have parties every night. I would always be worried about my next payment, but somehow, I lived in a rather nice apartment with brightly-colored walls and lavish furnishings. I would always be in a fight with one of my girlfriends, and I would always be crushing on my best friend’s boyfriend. Meanwhile, I am also falling in like with my adorable landlord, who I see at the gym every day. I would have a never-ending wardrobe that would fit me perfectly, and I would never wear the same thing twice. I would never have to worry about my jeans not staying up because they would be perfectly fitted to my body shape and size. I would work all day to come home to nine catty girls, all equally as attractive as myself and working towards the same goal. I would meet with famous people every day, and even though I also had to work a real job, I would do awesome things like go on shopping sprees and get photographed endlessly all day. Somehow. I would monopolize the phone and make out with lots of men.
And yet, somehow, I would find time to tend to the ranch and tell everyone about my parents with dwarf-syndrome. I would also go out and do crazy things like bungee-jumping and water-skiing and blowing up hot water heaters all the time, and go to awesome places like Paris, Japan, and Australia. I would go to the beach all the time and get the perfect tan, and have perfectly manicured nails every day.
It would be amazing.
And yet very, very wrong.
I don’t think I want to live in the real world.
